Instead Of Doing Something Useful: The Story Of My Life

[Silver Sorrow]

Interesting. Or not.

The Nexus owner's statement re: the original Yennifer mod was edited; now he's saying that the author removed the file himself.

Has anyone checked to see if Dark0ne has a brain tumor or something?

I mean...okay, if I ran the Nexus, I'd probably have one myself. Take a look at the banned users section of the forums sometime.

But as for the game...

I got to the part in the story where I was able to capture beasts for the Vivarium. Don't worry if that doesn't make any sense. I don't understand anything anymore, myself. Anyway, I don't really think I'll be using this feature all that much. Like potions or herbology. The only reason I conjured a planter was to grow a sweetmallow (or whatever) plant so I wouldn't have to fork over 100 bucks a pop for the leaves...that's how you activate the Merlin trials, btw.

Something just occurred to me (hey, I'm hungry and not that observant at the moment. Back off, sugarstick.): the economy. Am I paying 500 galleons for a crummy robe at a vendor, or is it 500 knuts? It's not really clear. I suppose I could forego lunch and delve into this conundrum, but...naaaah.

[Silver Sorrow]

It's galleons. I think there might be a serious disconnect between the value of a galleon in 1890 and 1990 (or thereabouts). Knuts, yes...Sickles maybe...but galleons?

Anyway, I finally got to fire up the game and tinker with settings. All maxed out to Ultra. Somewhat happy...I had to turn off one setting, which was kinda stupid. The game was telling me that the rendering resolution was 67% (1280xWhatever), something I took great umbrage with.

I found that turning off Upscaling, it let me go all the way up to 1920x1080, my typical gig. So it's working out. And it does look fantastic, especially when I turned on all the raytracing bells and whistles (interested to try it out on Cyberpunk). But...okay, that wasn't the point of the exercise. I got the new one because I had the feeling that my old computer was about to go tits-up.

I still have a couple of things to work out (for example: I have a separate soundcard, but it's using onboard sound; I think I need to call them...tomorrow), but otherwise I only spent maybe five hours getting everything to where I like it.

[Silver Sorrow]

Nah, didn't need to call support. I just had to look at the back of the computer. Wild, I know.

For some reason...wait, I know: two hours' worth of sleep. Anyway, I had just plugged the speakers into the motherboard -- that's a plot point in a sexbot movie, I know -- and thought that it would work, like magic.

Then it occurred to me, sometime around 5am, that I didn't actually plug the speakers in correctly. So I got that sorted out. ("Oh...what if I plug this doohickey into that thingamabob?") This is why my neighbors were treated to "Whole Lotta Love" at 5 in the morning. I would say I'm sorry, but I won't. Because I'm not. Just be glad it wasn't Gojira.

Wait, this is supposed to be my Hogwarts thread. Okay. How about a screenshot of how I feel about my capabilities as a functional human being?

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I should get me a jester hat, btw. Wear it all the damn time. Let people know what they're dealing with right off the bat.

[Silver Sorrow]

Trying to gt all the collection stuff. Why? Because I can. Probably. Just three more conjurations to find, and I've almost completed all of the challenges. 3 collection chests and one infamous foe away...but then there's the whole duelling challenge thing, which is just tiresome: "smash a leaping loyalist commander into the ground," that sort of thing. Cripes.

Anyway, I think I've just managed to create the nicest Slytherin ever. Not appearance-wise, I mean...I mean she should be a Hufflepuff, she's so helpful and...gaaaaah. That's it. I'm gonna roll a Hufflepuff who's so mean and nasty that she will tarnish their loyal/hardworking nature forever!

Kiki Snugglebunny will be the most glorious of dark witches! But adorable!

But, uh...back to my unambitious Slytherin...

I found Ron's Triwizard Gala robes.

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Tastefully hideous Victorian attire.

Christmas in the mess hall...uh...grub hub...uh...dining room?
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After all this, I'll probably dive back into Cyberpunk just to wash the wholesomeness from my soul. Or maybe a Bethesda game will come out. Who can tell? (I can. It won't.)

I will say that this game suffers from respawn-itis. Nothing is ever truly cleared out, which...just makes me so very tired. I think the only reason for it -- the only acceptable reason, as far as I'm concerned -- is to complete duelling and/or combat challenges. So if you fast-travel back to a quaint little village (and aren't they all?) with a dugbog problem nearby that you've already visited, be prepared to kill 'em again.

Bleh. Dugbogs are the worst. Trolls can be fun, but these assholes? Nope. Spell-sponges. And the game LOVES throwing a handful of them at the player at a time, so you're always dodging and protego-ing. There are only two ways to kill them quick: ancient magic and a levioso-diffendo combo when they rear up to hit you with their tongue. (Lift-and-slash, to be clear.)

New computer update: with all the options cranked up, I've only run into slowdown once: in Hogsmeade in the evening, during a minor snowfall. The particles, etc. were a bit too much and my frames tanked a bit, but I can't fault my system for it. There are reports of that kind of thing even on the really high-end stuff. (Imagine mortgaging your ancestral castle for an i9/4090 setup and still getting low FPS in Hogsmeade. Talk about distressing.)

On a somewhat completely unrelated note, I still haven't been able to get Malwarebytes working, even with their tech support. (God knows it's probably my fault entirely, so I'm not pointing fingers just yet.) Windows Defender is doing an adequate job (I think), so I'm not worried, really. But if they can't help me, I'll probably move on to something like Norton's. Alas. More research into stuff that doesn't interest me in the slightest.

[Silver Sorrow]

This may be indecent to mention, but I gotta say that the nude Professor Garlick mod does exactly what it implies. Too bad you have to search for it, though...it would definitely make herbology more interesting for those lukewarm on the subject.

[Let's pretend that I went all out and threw in a bunch of clever (or not) gardening metaphors and be done with it, okay? "Raises awareness of the environment, mother nature's warm, nurturing embrace..." that sort of thing. Great. It's nice that we had this chat.]

It's a shame that the Nexus can't see the necessity of such a mod. If there's any objection, all they have to say is: "Dolts! We're going Green...we're doing it for the Earth, you murderers!"

I hope Garlick is where they stop, though. Although Prof. Weasley has a sort of matronly ginger milf vibe going that--

--never mind. And, FYI, you probably shouldn't google "matronly ginger milf" unless you're some kind of evil sexist exploitative pervert fetishist. But if you are, I'll save you a seat on that ol' Hell-bound train.

[And no, I'm not posting screenshots of my conversation with Garlick.]

[Silver Sorrow]

The nude teacher mod is all in good fun, but honestly: it's kind of disturbing in its implications. A well-made disturbing, but disturbing nonetheless. So it's gone. I did keep the makeup mod for Garlick, as it puts her in a more glammed-up light; she normally gives off this makeup-free unwashed hippie impression, so at least with her wearing makeup I'm not thinking of hairy ginger pits. (Unless that's your thing, in which case: shine on you crazy diamond.)

I could go on about what I call "the Bubble Butt Mods" for the female player character, but I won't. I'm really just procrastinating scheduling an appointment for labs; I'm tired of giving blood samples. No, check that: I'm really tired of driving 20 miles through morning traffic to a shitsplat town I hate to give blood samples.

Uh...other than that, I finished the MQ. You get to do a few things after that, like finish up any unfinished side quests and challenges and the like, so that's nice.

I only died once during the game, and that was due to a collision problem, or something. (I jumped onto a roof in a ruined castle, and I slid to the junction between it and a wall; the game didn't know what to do with me, so it just killed me. Lovely.) This is quite impressive for me, as I've been known to die during tutorials. So it...

...enough stalling already. I gotta make a couple of calls.

[Silver Sorrow]

Holy underwear. I 100%'ed this sucker.

I had initially entered the final quest (talking to Prof. Weasley) at level 39 with but a smidgen of XP needed to reach level 40 (the cap) and only one sidequest short of getting the 100% relationship/sidequest challenge. I thought that 1) I would get the XP needed, and 2) maybe it would have an effect on Weasley's comments if I wasn't all the way there.

As it turned out, the answer to both of those was "nope."

Actually, I didn't know that the sidequest I had missed was a game goof; it had to do with killing an infamous foe connected to a quest-giver in Cragcroft (or whatever) who wanted the guy dead. I had offed the bastard before speaking to her, so I was a little puzzled when I talked to her and recognized the name she mentioned, but nothing came of it. But I moved on because I had other things to worry about.

So doing a bit of searching, I ran across a reddit thread where someone mentioned that they were short one sidequest, and it came back to the woman in Cragcroft (again: whatever), and they were in the same situation as me. Or I. How I hate my own language. (How me hates meesa own talky-talky, diddly-pom?) Their solution was just to go there and talk to her again, problem solved.

So I did that. Boom: XP achieved, quest finished, level 40 achieved.

And everyone who's ever met me thought that I'd never make something of myself. Showed them.

Also, due to plenty of free time, I'm just three achievements short of getting ALL of them. This is totally unheard of for me. Well...I did that for Skyrim. But I've had YEARS to pull off that little miracle.

The three achievements are hidden; I know what they are, though. I won't spoil it entirely, but it involves playing up to a certain point in all four Houses.

Um...maybe I did spoil it. Well, hell. One more sin to add to a very long list.

While I'm on that subject: it's spelled "Diffindo" and not "diffendo." My apologies. I shall fling myself in front of a beer wagon out of remorse for my crime.

Anyway, still percolating my impressions of the game. I have four nitpicks that I will mention here, though:

1. The menus are a bit too languid when you switch between them. I prefer them to switch a lot faster.

2. The world map needs a filter. Maybe I'd like to toggle only certain things, such as the Merlin trials. It's all a bit clunky, as it is.

3. It takes WAY too long to pick up the Unforgivable Curses...which is true of many useful features, such as Alohomora (door unlocking), broom-riding, and so on.

4. Spell cooldowns are a bit ridiculous. Avada Kedavra, for example, has a thirty second cooldown.

So there it is. Slytherin won the House Cup, thanks to me. We had a quite a blast celebrating, me and the other five people in Slytherin. Woo-hoo.

[Silver Sorrow]

I have no idea what my problem is sometimes. "Always...uh, never...forget to check your references."

Avada Kedavra's cooldown is TWO MINUTES, not thirty seconds. If I somehow manage to survive being run over by the beer wagon, I'll do something far worse to myself in the name of atonement: I'll listen to an entire Garth Brooks album. I'm requesting that my casket be closed at my funeral, 'cuz it won't be a pretty sight.

Btw, here's another little spoiler for you kids: there is (currently) NO penalty for using Unforgivable Curses on foes. So I guess my squeaky-clean Slytherin was just being morally superior for no reason at all.

Cutesy Shit: the ingredient you harvest from dead trolls is "Troll Bogeys." Let's not dance around it: boogers. In fact, that's the Word Of The Day, Everyday: Booger!

Boogerboogerboogerboogerboogerboogerboogerboogerboogerboogerboogerbooger!

[Silver Sorrow]

That's it, you muggle motherfu...uh...jerks. It's time for Kiki Snugglebunny to kick your sad little hopes and dreams into a cocked hat!

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Uh...wait...no, I--

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No, no, no...that's not right. This isn't even the right game. Is it? I don't...

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Okay, here we go. That's the future Hell-gaaaah! Hufflepuff.

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But rest assured, without the frumpy 19th century casualwear -- and an additional five to ten years' worth of physical conditioning and chronological growth -- she totally looks like V.

Okay, no she doesn't. Not in the slightest.

Still, this is a crossover I'd like to see. If she can't kill you with spells or poisons, then she'll fry your brain with her very mind! That is, provided you also have cybernetic implants she can hack. If not, well...there's always the magic of assault rifles.

[Silver Sorrow]

I can't be evil?

Seriously?

I can't take all of the power for myself and transform the earth into a seething hellscape?

That blows.

So in essence: your decisions rarely matter, except that choosing the less-than-charitable dialog options usually results in people not liking you as much (if at all). No, the only decision that truly affects you is what House you pick. And that only changes your common room and ONE main quest, which is unique to each House. That's it. You make the same friends, encounter the same people, and so on.

The only reason to play more than once is that one unique quest. Well...a second playthrough might be good if you want to mess around with gameplay mods and such.

So I guess I'm done for now. Really good game, regardless.

I was considering playing Fallout 4 again, but the thought of having to deal with Piper put me off the subject entirely. Blech.

[Silver Sorrow]

Well...overcoming my trepidation at failing miserably, I tried installing and running SW Battlefront II (the most recent one) again. It wouldn't run at all on my last computer, for some reason. (I suspect several things, but have no concrete evidence.) But it works now. All I had to do was buy a new computer.

I'm wondering if DA Inquisition will work, too...downloading that now.

In the meantime, I've been dealing with random crashes in Hogwarts, and I think it my have something to do with all that raytracing nonsense. I noticed definite slowdowns in some areas of the school and Hogsmeade, as well as the fact that surfaces in the school were...very shiny. Like everything had been overpolished to the point of flash-frying everyone's retinas.

The last straw was this scene:

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Ouch.

So I've turned off raytracing. I also turned off all the stupid shit they put in these games, such as motion blur, film grain, chromatic aberration, monochromatic flagellation, asymptomatic rosicrucianism, and so on.

I've been busy, so I haven't had the chance to try out my new settings yet. All I've had the time to do is just tinker.

Although my V is looking...interesting...of late.

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It's one of those situations when it's 5am and I'm not playing the game, I'm trying to get Arasaka Cyberarms to work with the Solo Body and all these other things and I think I just fried my brain. You know how that goes. Or maybe you don't. Point is: I need sleep.

What else? Oh, Insaniquarium runs nicely, so there is that.

Update:

Hogwarts doesn't look so goddamn shiny now...actually it looks pretty normal. Inspired, I turned it off in Cyberpunk. Really, who needs it? Until the various game devs figure out how to make this crap work in their games, it's useless.

Raytracing. Pfffft. Eye-candy for trendwhores.

Yet Another Update Because I Forgot:

Has anyone noticed that the training dummy at the beginning (the one as offered by coach Fred) is really hard to beat, even on easy? I realized this a couple of patches back, but I just thought it was some kind of fluke. And I can't rule out that maybe it's just me and it's my fault entirely.

Yeah, that sounds about right. It's always my fault. I regret even mentioning it now.

[Silver Sorrow]

A Little To The Left is one of those "how OCD are you?" games that proves time and again that even the most tranquil and soothing background music can be the last straw that triggers a murderous rampage.

However, rest assured that you can always quit and play something that's far less rage-inducing, such as watching Rise Of Skywalker with a paper cut on your primary genitalia.

The gameplay is simple...perhaps too simple...but effective: move various items around into some semblance of order. This is primarily a game for people who attach stamps to envelopes with the aid of a ruler. It is NOT for those who toss their junk in a drawer and say, "enh...good enough."

It soon becomes clear that the perpetrator of a great deal of this messiness is a cat. The cat shows up in the form of a paw that might swipe at something you're doing. Not to your detriment, no. Well...not often, anyway.

The cat is the ultimate enemy, as is appropriate. I haven't finished the game yet, so I don't know if I get to blast the furry bastard into a fine red mist. I sincerely hope I get the chance.

Anyway, the game's on sale on Steam right now. As is This Is The Zodiac Speaking, which I also picked up. Why, I have no idea. But why should I start questioning my life choices now?

[Silver Sorrow]

Getting DA Inquisition working with Frosty Mod Manager has been one of the more interestingly tortuous ordeals I've been through lately, but let's not forget that being miserable builds character.

First off, it doesn't work just right off. If you have the Steam version -- and why shouldn't you? -- you need FrostyFix, which will make it work with Steam. Now...that's the idea. However, I needed it to work with the [expletives deleted] EA launcher, which doesn't seem to like the idea of being useful. So it isn't. It's just another dumb roadblock in the way to actually playing a game.

Anyway, instead of setting FrostyFix to use a global setting, I set it to work with the EA platform. This seemed to work...until I enabled a mod.

Ah. More nightmares. Yay.

The mod in question was the Enhanced Character Creation mod. To get THAT to work, I needed the Bioware Localization plugin. After installing that, it worked.

Confetti, dancing, crimes against nature.

So now I'm going through the list of things I need to do to get my Qunari character back into action. Happily, I have no interest in trying to make that cockney asshat elf, whatsername, pretty. So that's one or more mods I don't have to worry about installing.

Well...I think I killed enough time. Lunch is out for delivery.

On a completely unrelated note, I will not accept that the economy has improved until tacos go back to being under $1.

[Silver Sorrow]

WARNING: This post (and the next) relates only to Dragon Age Inquisition. If you don't like that, then...you're probably far more well-adjusted than I am. Oh, well.

So...I spent a couple of hours trying to figure out why my custom hair/horns were showing up in chargen, but not in the actual game. Disabling mods, enabling mods, mangling an orange that didn't want to be peeled (seriously, scientists: forget the whole curing cancer thing; figure out how to give oranges natural zippers!)...that sort of thing.

I considered the idea of just giving up and learning how to type better, because my typing is friggin' atrocious!

Happily, I was saved from bettering myself by stumbling across a requirement that I had completely forgotten when dealing with custom hair: make sure that your mesh settings are set to "ultra."

Since DAI was released in the dim, dark days of the mid-2010's, it had no intention of recognizing my hardware and defaulted to low settings all around. Jerks. So I cranked the living tar out of my settings...lo and behold, everything was as it should be.

More confetti, more dancing, more crimes against nature.

Then I spent another half hour or so creating a new character with a new hairstyle, because I wasn't entirely happy with what I had. (This is a recurring theme in nature and society.) Then I realized, when I got outside the holding cell, that I had messed up the hair color. That meant that I would either have to live with it until I got to the Black Emporium (and then have to deal with a nightmare of potential issues), or go back and redo chargen entirely.

I do a lot of internal screaming. It's just become part of my identity.

So with more time wasted (but isn't it all just a waste of time? killing time until sweet, sweet death overtakes us, finally?), I finally emerged from the holding cell into the light...and I'm not happy with the amount of shine on the hair. The lighting is overbright and weird in this segment on purpose, I remind myself. In the rest of the game, that same shiny hair will look normal, while the flat black coloration will look like someone stuck a wet black cat to her head.

These are the things I tell myself.

Anyway, why not a few screenshots? Sorry, it wasn't an entreaty. It was something far more sinister.

Part One of the madness: first hair versus current hair.

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In the next post, I will continue this nonsense. Because I have nothing better to do today. Actually...I do, but I don't wanna do it.

[Silver Sorrow]

Part Two of the madness: it's better than cleaning out closets.

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This woman cannot sleep on her back. I think she just has someone hang her from a hat rack at night.

Anyway, on this wondrous odyssey...hey, I spelled odyssey right!...of self loathing, I was reminded of two things about myself: one, I have a hard time following instructions; two, that glass of orange juice was a really bad idea. I should stick to something less caustic, such as straight hydrofluoric acid. Bluuhhhhh...